I Quit!

I Quit!

Hello Everyone! I’ve been thinking much lately about quitting Beautifully-Complex. I do not give it enough of my attention as I should. It’s not because I don’t want to, it’s because I want it to be bigger than I could have ever imagined. I don’t know how to do that, and it’s becoming overwhelming.

I start thinking about the people that I have let down by not being consistent with my posts. I think about how discouraged I get to write. I think about how I’m from a small town in North Carolina.

“How can I do this?” “I don’t feel noticed.”

I do know that writing does make me feel better. Recently, I’ve been writing for the wrong purposes, and it started pushing me away from it. I want to produce greatness and I forget that it’s for fun. I have to re-explore writing for fun and writing for me. I’m tired of writing about the same thing.

My supporters keep me going (shout out to my faithful few.) They believe in me when I don’t believe in myself. I don’t know what I’m doing or what I want.

Obliviously, I’m a hot mess at times. We’re all hot messes. I can get too overwhelmed or frustrated to try, just like the next person. I get stuck on the “I don’ts” and everything inside me pauses.It's hard for me to get over the hump, so I start to think "What's the point?"

With that being said I recently ran across a quote that stated: “It’s a slow process, but quitting won’t speed it up.” Wow, right? That really couldn’t have come at a better time. I can’t quit Beautifully-Complex. I can’t let myself become too overwhelmed to do what I love doing. It’s not easy at all. Consistency is something that I work on every day. It’s ok if I miss a few months to get my head back on straight. It’s not ok to just stop.

Beautifully-Complex is my open diary. It reminds me that I have a purpose. It no longer matters to me how many people reads my blog or share it, because it reaches who it NEEDS to reach. I’m proud of the work that I put into it. Hopefully soon, I can think of new ways to express myself other than the blogs. Eventually, I will make Beautifully-Complex more than my blogs. Let the creativity flow, and the pressure or perfection be gone. As always, thank you for reading.