Insecurities pt. 3: Emotions

Insecurities pt. 3: Emotions

It’s true what people say; the ones with the biggest hearts, gets hurt the worst. I am a big bag of emotions. Since I was younger, I’ve always let my emotions control me. I never like this about myself. It opens up a window to so much that I can’t seem to handle. I hate that I can’t just turn my emotions off.

I feel as if my emotions make me appear as weak. Like I’ve been stripped down to nothing, but my heart. I also feel alone. Everyone else can just handle their emotions and I just let them take over me. This is the most embarrassing insecurity about me. The insecurity that I have an extremely hard time accepting and always fight against. Every day I make it my mission to care less. But I seem to feel more and more.

I have adapted to not let negative people and their actions hurt me. I have learned to distance myself when necessary. I know no one is out there to get me. I know people have their own ways of dealing with situations. I want to be like others when it comes to handling my emotions. I don’t want to be weak. But this is who I am. Cadesia, the over-caring, over- loving, big bag of emotions. I just hope someday I’ll be able to control them better.